Friday, June 19, 2009

Hillary Clinton Undergoes Elbow Surgery Plus Face Lift & Full Body Lipo?

Proud Mother of the Rumored Bride-to-be, Chelsea?

WASHINGTON – On the heels of swirling rumors over a Chelsea Clinton wedding this August on Martha's Vineyard, Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton successfully underwent surgery today to allegedly repair a “fractured right elbow” sustained Wednesday while walking around the State Department garage. Hmm. (Why does this remind me of a few high school senior girls who timed their “car accidents” in taxi-cabs while vacationing over spring break in Las Vegas where they sustained “broken noses” among other “minor injuries” to the upper body but came back to school with notably improved noses and Hooters quality chests just in time for graduation?)

A department statement says Hillary had surgery Friday morning at The George Washington University Hospital and then returned to her Washington home. LWOH has confirmed that GWU Hospital sports some of the nation's finest plastic surgeons, and new rumors abound over whether Hillary purposely broke her right elbow to get out of horribly boring State Department work for a couple of months or if she indeed did break said elbow but worked out a twofer for a special “Mother of the Bride” deal with a rhytidectomy - slang for tune up the ol' mug -- just in time for the the upcoming shindig. 

Unconfirmed sources speculate that the matrimonial shindig will be hosted either at Vernon Jordan's or Mary Steenburgen and Ted Danson's place for Chelsea and her longtime beau, Marc Mezvinsky.

We wish Hillary a speedy recovery! And with a couple of months of R&R, the rumoured MOB (Mother of the Bride) should have a newly improved leg up on the former First Family's nuptial party planning.



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