I process humanity with meatpacker's skill. Not to mince words,
I'm the cold-blooded killer of success. I win. You lose. Every time.
What's more, you LOVE it. -c.
Losing the War on Humor Welcomes CharlieSheenIT
to Exclusive San Francisco Bay Moral INTurpitude Dude Lodge
THE GAY SWAMI “Official” CharlieSheenIT Sobriety Coach
Head Exploding News
Sherman Oaks – After getting sacked for committing egregious acts like “moral turpitude” and “cocaine” as this shocking TMZ report reveals, Twitter sensation CharlieSheenIT suddenly announced today that he is astral projecting north to San Francisco where he'll hang his fedora at Losing the War on Humor. Carlos will join hosts 2Truthy, Mel Toast and THE GAY SWAMI who has offered his (sort of) pro-bono sobriety coaching services for all the blow and Marlboros Charlie can pack in the trunk of his black Mercedes.
Who's behind the move? Non other than His Holiness, THE GAY SWAMI.
Tired and horribly bored with all the camped out camera crews and ex-wives with mere mortal brains hanging around the Sherman Oaks Sober Lodge, the Torpedo of Turpitude is determined to sweat out Alien Truth and seek a higher dimension at the otherworldly San Francisco Bay Moral INTurpitude Dude Lodge. Light years away from the stench of Chuck and the rest of those Warner Brothers Television losers, he will be surrounded by the goddesses, his bookie, Sean Penn, and Shiva the Destroyer among other tiger blood drinking enablers.
Please welcome Charlie in his pursuit of a Higher Powder.
He. Is. Winning!
Process that, Loserettes!