Saturday, July 4, 2009

Happy 4th of July!

(Special thanks to the Immortal Godfather of Soul, Mr. James Brown)


The approach of the 4th of July typically signifies three things: bad music of the John Phillips Sousa variety, terrifying tales of blown up alligators during the Battle of New Orleans, and even worse, torturous tributes to past and contemporary occupants of that Big Whorehouse on the Potomac. I'm talking extremity-splitting propaganda in the form of oppressive “new media” coverage here, the type our ambitious forefathers used to overcome their enemies with before the invention of the waterboard.

On the other hand, what better day to enjoy friends and family with a barbecue and to take comfort in knowing that people all across the country are launching illegal fireworks since many local governments have cancelled fireworks displays ?

Happy 4th of July!


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