Thursday, February 5, 2009

Bill Gates Releases Mosquitoes, Spreads the Hubris Disease

(Photo credits James Duncan Davidson/TED)
Bill Gates Releases Mosquitoes, Spreads Hubris Disease


For Immediate Release


Long Beach, CA – Bill Gates knows something about bugs. Bill “Give Me Infinite H-1B Visas” Gates shocked a crowd of “technology kings” and other premiere “luminaries and visionaries” Wednesday at the annual TED (Technology, Entertainment, Design) Conference when he released mosquitoes into the audience.


One So. Cal LWOH stealth operative in attendance marveled over the ease with which Gates “released the hubris disease” on the pampered yet panicked audience who feared for their safety, “and possibly their lives.” Furiously scrambling for blackberries to contact their personal physicians to double check on their vaccination records, Gates assured the terrified crowd that


“these here, these are the healthy, elite mosquitos with access to healthcare” and that “only poor people from other countries who need our h$lp get the diseased, skanky ones.”


The King of Hubris Himself marveled over his concern for people from other countries instead of people from his own. His adamant hatred for American white collar professionals took center stage as he explained to the wildly applauding, insider audience his displeasure with the new Grassley/Sanders proposed amendment which would make businesses of TARP money hire only Americans for one year. (Yours truly has been reporting on such American white collar job hits for years, as in this 2007 Citibank announcement, along with others such as AT&T’s Randall Stephenson to name a few who have been slashing and burning American white collar jobs for sport since 1993.) Gushed an exultant Gates:



“Vista sucks, everybody knows it and I’ve got to do something with myself. As you all know, if I were a TARP recipient, I’d be damned to let that magnificent bastard and good friend Chuck Grassley and Bernie Sanders tell me I had to hire Americans for one year. Hehe, that’s why I laid a bunch of them off already! Our TARP player pals at the banks on Wall Street did the same thing, too, hehe. We know how to beat the street. And Americans. Cut American jobs, service and development for one year (who cares!) It’s so, so great to be King!”


Silicon Valley Venture Capitalist/Businessman and Beltway insider Al Gore was of course on hand to rip the coal industry a new one for their shocking claims that “coal is clean.” Meanwhile, Naturally 7 “recreated the sound of musical instruments with their voices” that sounded like a cross between “The Flight of the Bumblebees” meets “Slash.”


Don’t you, dear pleb reader, wish you could have been an insect amongst such esteemed blood suckers on the wall for this exclusive soiree, too?

-2Truthy

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

2T,
What would have been a much better hoot would have been to have had actual malaria carrying bugs released.
Oops! So sorry, folks. Wrong jar!
And as they were released he would tell the audience that nets were available for $50,000 each.
My bad! And grab some quinine on the way out.
Buh Bye!

2Truthy said...

Also, how did Bugman know that the jar didn't have mosquitoes carrying the Lyme? Maybe next year he'll get it right. Just like Vista.

Anonymous said...

Hey, no fair picking on Vista. I used to live there!

Anonymous said...

"Malaria is spread by mosquitoes," Gates said simply, before freeing the insects. "I brought some. Here I'll let them roam around. There is no reason only poor people should be infected."

--I guess that would be racist!--

2Truthy said...

"There is no reason only poor people should be infected."

The Neo-Frat Boy, Bully Gates is the corprate poster boy for "Eat Shit, Educated Americans" who are being outsourced and slashed from job opportunites so he and his frat boy BFF's can enjoy profiting from their H-1B slaves at the expense of this country's economy and the lives of its citizens.

His 'guilt' about poverty in other countries doesn't hide his sociopathic contempt to deep six American white collar professionals.

prez, ya!

Anonymous said...

I would have loved to be there in the room! HI! I'm Bill Gates and I am releasing mosquitos! Yes, they will bite you and make you itch!

"OH and BELIEVE ME these mosquitos don't have Malaria." YES, and VISTA is is good for your computer!

WHAT did he have them individually tested? How does he know? DUH, HE DOESN'T! And guess what: HE DOESN'T CARE! ESPECIALLY ABOUT YOU! And by you, I mean everybody.

Anonymous said...

Gates should be sued for this reckless and malicious assault on the audience.

If I brought a komodo dragon (the same kind that bit the toe off Phil Bronstein's foot at the San Diego Zoo)to a conference and unleashed it from its cage, shouting to the audience

"Don't worry, somebody at the local wildlife refuge told me that this komodo dragon has been domesticated. But jungle natives shouldn't be the only ones to get their toes torn off!"

at the very least, I'd be barred from ever making a keynote speech on behalf of the TED C again - let alone arrested.

This is an example of why some people should never be filthy rich.

2Truthy said...

LOL BF! The Bronstein analogy bites into the core of this smug fascist's contemptuous, foreboding view of the U.S. slide into a banana republic that he and his hubris soaked ilk seek to control. Pay to play, or else, get thumped by the jack boots, heil vista!
Swell role model, that corporate "leader" Bully Gates...

prez, how DID he know for sure none of these 'designer' mosquitoes carried malaria or other diseases like West Nile? Perhaps he himself tested them? Has he been breeding little disease carriers in his stealth, northern hobby shop/laboratory - the Norwegian Seed Vault -- feeding on some scary genetically modified seeds from MONSANTO, the corp. he supports?

The Bill and Melinda Gates supported Monsanto is forcing their GM seeds on African farmers which is destroying their
livelihoods and crops.

In addition, Monsanto is destroying forever India's vast biodiversity in seeds and crops and the suicide rate has soared amongst small, local farmers there.

Which clueless saps actually buy this GOP'er "bleeding for the poor" bullshit? Even "bipartisan" Dems, that's who.

Gates is a sociopath, who has since 1993 stepped over the outsourced/unemployed bodies of American CS and IT professionals just to profit from H-1B slaves. This mean-spirited, greedy and looting ilk puts no value on civility, community and local human sustainability.

Mwahahahaha, take THAT, you worthless American professional insects, and you third world farmers whom I'll swat because I am filthy rich and nobody is stopping me!

Anonymous said...

This is insane, to connect his labor policy with his anti-malaria initiatives. He still pays me remarkably well, so I continue waiting for this crushing globalist labor glut you all predict.

2Truthy said...

Anonymous,

Bill Gates' hubris diseased brand of "philanthropy" and "hate Americans" irresponsible bug jar PR stunt can bite me.

I will, however, be the first to congratulate you on the size of your "remarkably" large MS paycheck, but beg to differ with your inane assertion that there is no connection between what you refer to as Gates' "labor practices" and "anti-malaria initiatives." The glaring problem being that your argument has no problem with Americans being tossed to the curb by wealthy American CEO billionaires who THEN go off to third world countries to atone for their crimes against humanity, civility and common decency in their own backyards.

Gates' philanthropy "initiatives" outside of this country conveniently play down his monopolistic and greedy, unconsionable initiatives in our country to replace American white collar professionals via labor arbitrage and insourcing/outsourcing with cheap foreign labor.

If, as the expression goes, charity begins at home, why is Mr. Gates so busy tearing apart our families by killing white collar job opportunities for Americans?

For example, if a multi-billionaire murderer and a thief sets up a foundation with millions of dollars (just for fun, say, half of it earned the right way, and half of it stolen)with the mission statement of funding "anti-malaria initiatives", that's one hell of a conscious assuaging, slick PR maneuvre, isn't it? (The mob, btw, does this all the time. So do the CIA and the Catholic Church.) My question for you is: does this make them any less guilty of murder and theft?

American taxpayers subsidize many of the corporations (like the one that you so humbly inform us renumerates you "remarkably well")who make a few CEOs very, very wealthy. And what do those CEOs do? Turn around and stick it to white collar Americans.

THAT, anon, is the definition of insane - insanity that Americans have put up with these scheming greedsters for far too long.

Anonymous said...

To quote Anonymous (you f'ing coward):

"This is insane, to connect his labor policy with his anti-malaria initiatives. He still pays me remarkably well, so I continue waiting for this crushing globalist labor glut you all predict.

My jaw is on the floor. I seriously don't know where to begin. Let me start by talking about "Anonymous'" "remarkable well" salary. Hey Anonymous! How's the house on Mercer Island? Or do you live with the rest of the MicroSerfs[tm] in the dorms (haha, referred to as condos) across the street from "One Microsoft Way?"

I bet you don't even know that there is no address such as "One Microsoft Way"? It was made up by Billy Gates, who probably said, "I don't give a f'ck, the Post Office has no choice: they can deliver the mail to my made-up address, or they can choke on it!!"

As to Billy's sudden interest in third world diseases such as malaria: this is a well worn path. Monopolists such as Carnegie and Rockefeller, after sucking the American People dry, used their ill gotten wealth to be "generous."

Here is the contrast: these older Monopolists used their wealth to help the American People. Did you know that if you are accepted at Cooper' Union College in Manhatten, you don't pay a penny of tuition? Courtesy of these Monopolists? And that is just one example.

What is Billy doing? He's trying to bribe India. He's giving them a ton of cash. Why? He's scared SHITLESS that they won't use WINDOWS. What will they use? LINUX. The bribe won't work. They LOVE LINUX in India (and every where else in the third world).

The good news is that Billy will stop malaria (except among Americans in his vicinity).

Anonymous said...

That's Bill Gate's for you. Not too bright.

If I was in that audiance front row and center I would have sued. The issue is not of disease. If someone walks up to you, and unleashes a swarm of blood thirsty parasites in your face, even if you don't even get bit by one, that should reasonably be considered a form of assault.

There is also the simple fact of WHY Mosquitos are seen as dangerous. Because they are capable of transferring disease from one subject to another. (They have to get Malaria from someone!) If someone in that audiance had HIV, and was bitten by one of those Mosquitos, there is a chance that it is now infected with HIV which it can spread to others in the audiance.

And beyond that, it's part of the larger issue that Microsoft never has grasped. Just because a product, by itself, alone, appears safe, doesn't mean it will be safe in the real world. Microsoft doesn't live in the real world.

2Truthy said...

"If someone in that audiance had HIV, and was bitten by one of those Mosquitos, there is a chance that it is now infected with HIV which it can spread to others in the audiance."

Anon,

Thanks for your excellent comment on the legality issues with this horrific stunt. It truly was the most irresponsible, conspicuous acts of hostility and hatred toward his fellow humans in the audience. But then again, Bill Gates is superhuman and above the law, eh?