Sunday, May 9, 2010

Tiger Quits TPC, May Have Bulging Dick

(Elin and Tiger Woods Out Clubbing)

  Tiger Withdraws from Celebrity Championship

Fears He May Have Bulging Dick Disk

Breaking News 

PONTE VEDRA BEACH, Fla. (AP) – In yet another sudden blow to Tiger Woods who was supposed to be on the ninth hole at the Celebrity Championship, the celebrity pro golfer “withdrew suddenly with neck pain” in fear it might be a bulging dick disk.

The revealing comment raised several eyebrows from at least three reporters, as a “frustrated” Woods slumped down in front of his locker and gave the following unofficial statement:

I’ve been playing around with a bad neck for about a month,” the troubled star said. “But after my emergency trip to the hospital on Nov. 27 to fix my busted up lip and very sore neck after being hit by a bitching wedge when I drove my Escalade over a fire hydrant and into a tree, I'm taking every precaution to avoid any further stiffness and monitor my swing.”


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