Monday, April 28, 2008

Bowling with Barack Obama

Why I'd Rather go Bowling with Barry

It’s not that I dislike Obama… In fact, I would prefer to go bowling with Barry any day over Hillary or McCain, albeit because he’s a lousy bowler and I’d get to beat him -- which is not saying much, since yours truly, legendary non-bowler, has got to be the world’s most notorious bowling spazz…and not only does he live in my old Chicago Hyde Park neighborhood, but Barry is left handed -- which immediately spurs a sense of camaraderie as every lefty such as yours truly knows who holds the superior hand.

Oh – and that pastor disaster thing? Fuggedabowdit. Dismissing Barry over the pastor’s sermon is like telling your Anglican aunt she’s not qualified to run for City Council because her church secretary regularly takes an occasional two hour martini lunch with the attractive new female vicar. I mean, come on.

Plus, I’d be comfortable bowling with Obama also since he’s probably gay and wouldn't have to worry about him trying to hit on me. Besides, gay guys are always more fun to hang out with, anyway. And come to think about, Barry’s really been remarkably above board when it comes to remaining civil while leveling criticisms at the Bush administration which certainly lines him up to inherit the legacy of Dubya’s decent blow connection where an Eight ball (not to be confused with Skee ball) is known by Chicago South Side bowling masters to improve one’s chances of rolling a perfect 300 with no warm up required.

Whatsmore, since some of the nation’s leading blowhards have hailed from a certain Ivy in Cambridge, MA, the fact that Obama is a Haahvaad man is no doubt a handicap - so who in their right minds would actually think the man knows diddly about bowling?

And how about that Mayhill Fowler? Obama is who he is, a hybrid or composite of a rich and diverse backround (emphasis rich) and not merely some dime-store “elitist” with an even more elitist following, some with huge checkbooks. The elitism sticker or “brand” can be put to good use or bad use, whichever way he chooses to play it. That’s the problem: we just don’t know what “believing in hope” is going to get us once he’s elected, and the more he talks about, the less je ne sais quois we feel…

To all of those Clinton and McCain supporters, Fowler sure was in the wrong place at the right time, as the taped recording proves. Sure, Barry had the right to tell his SF peeps at the wine infused real estate developer’s castle/fundraiser how (in so many words) the race card has got to be played by insinuating that all of those downscale white PA losers don’t want to hear a black guy talking about stuff that up until now, only white candidates got to talk about. Sure. He’s got that down, and the truth is, he and his supporters will play on that through November, should he win the nomination (and beyond) should he win the election. This is inevitable, and the fact that otherwise respectable journos won’t hold his feet (equally as well as the other candidates) to the fire ON THE ISSUES like disappearing white collar jobs, universal or single payer healthcare, Iraq/Iran and the rapid erosion of our civil liberties is a failure on the part of all voters. And is Obama the only mumbling something about capital gains tax cuts?

Like the two other candidates, if Barry really wants to live in that Pennsylvania Ave. DC mansion, doesn’t he owe every voter the promise to stick it to the man?

At the very least, this is what I hope for. Now to believe any of it, much less “hope to believe” it...


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