Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Goin' Down: Turn Up the Volume

(Very special thanks to Jeff Beck)

Russian Analyst Predicts Hurricane “Colossal Shitstorm” Headed for the U.S.

“I got my head out the window, and my big feet on the ground.”
-Jeff Beck

We’re goin’ down. Igor Panarin, a leading analyst and professor at the Diplomatic Academy of the Russian Ministry of Foreign Affairs, has confirmed his long-held view that the United States is heading for collapse, and will divide into separate parts. When asked who would replace the U.S. in regulating world markets, he said:

"Two countries could assume this role: China, with its vast reserves, and Russia, which could play the role of a regulator in Eurasia."

How many areas of will the U.S. be divided into? Oh, around six parts, as Panarin offered this prediction:

“The U.S. will break up into six parts - the Pacific coast, with its growing Chinese population; the South, with its Hispanics; Texas, where independence movements are on the rise; the Atlantic coast, with its distinct and separate mentality; five of the poorer central states with their large Native American populations; and the northern states, where the influence from Canada is strong.”

Ummm…“the Atlantic coast, with its distinct and separate mentality”? Got that, New Yawkas? And what type of “mentality” might that be? Oh well. Thanks for the heads up, Igor. We have only ourselves to blame.


Cross-posted at BlondeSense


Citizen Carrie said...

I don't really believe it will happen, but I do see a glimmer of a potential in the way our leaders seem to playfully pit different regions of the country against each other. (e.g., the current spat between Michigan and Alabama with regard to domestic and foreign car manufacturers.)

I'm sure all the usual suspects would profit from a breakup of the U.S.

Peter of Lone Tree said...

The U.S. Treasury Market Reaches Breaking Point; 20 Percent of Trading Volume Represents “Fails” or Bonds That Will not Be Delivered on Schedule:
As attention focuses on the treasury market’s ability to cope with the US’s growing funding needs, Euromoney reveals the structural issue that could cause the world’s market of last resort to grind to a halt in its hour of greatest need.

The problem: the settlement system for the US government bond market has broken down.

2Truthy said...

I agree CC, and have to call out old Igor for "wishful balkanized thinking" on this one.

Petey, only 20%? Thanks for this interesting link. All of it is making my head explode, just like this youtube video I found in the link:

You have to watch this video through to the end

Melvin Toast said...

I believe it's time to dust off the MIRVs, ladies and gentlemen!

This is Mel in Minnesota watching the muslim terrorist massacre in Bombay unfold on TV.

2Truthy said...

That'll work, Mel. A tanking superpower fighting fire with fire...Besides, you don't think Igor might just have an overactive imagination?

2Truthy said...

Hey Mel, will you tell sis-in-law to pump up the volume here and boogie down? Recalling her moves at the Pole's nuptial blast;)